A Perfect Circle - "Eat The Elephant"

A Perfect Circle are an Alternative Metal supergroup who formed in the late 90's.  Now, I've been very vocal about this in the past, and today is no different.  I'm no fan of Tool, and I'm far from a fan of Maynard James Keenan as well.  Mostly because, I'm just really not that into Progressive Metal.  But when I got older and discovered some of A Perfect Circle's stuff, I was pleasantly surprised.  The band consists of members of Tool, The Smashing Pumpkins, and others as well.  Their 2000 debut was actually, a pretty solid start for this project.  Like a lot of people, I was into some of the more straightforward and accessible tracks  like "Judith" and "The Hollow", but tracks like "Thinking of You" and "Thomas" made for really fantastic deep cuts.  It was when the band got into more artsy territory like on crowd favorite "3 Libras" that the band started to lose me.  But still, this album overall surprised me with just how much I enjoyed it.  A Perfect Circle returned in 2003 with "Thirteenth Step", with a much more patient sound.  The majority of the tunes on here you really needed to sit with, which did have some mixed results.  There were some of the best tunes that Perfect Circle had written yet, like singles "The Outsider" and "Blue".  But there were also painfully long tunes like "The Package" that went almost nowhere.  While I wasn't crazy about these tunes, I totally get why most people went nuts for them.  I dug "Thirteenth Step" and all for the most part, but I wanted Perfect Circle to get a little back to basics.  2004 showed A Perfect Circle return with a covers album, "eMOTIVe".  Now, here they covered everyone from Marvin Gaye to Black Flag.  And these covers are RADICALLY different than their originals.  Like, there are a few decent tunes, but this is a MASSIVE mixed bag.  So it has been a whopping 14 years since we've heard from A Perfect Circle.  But nonetheless they're back, with a bunch of singles that are incredibly all over the place.  Let's chat.

(A personal favorite of mine!  Yep, it's generic as hell, don't @ me)

    This album starts off with the title track, “Eat The Elephant”, which is no joke, some piano rock.  I mean, there certainly is a very creeping element to this that’s undeniable.  Not to mention, Maynard’s performance adds such a chilling aspect.  It’s alright, but for those of you that have been waiting for over 14 years for a return to the sounds of “Thirteenth Step”, you’re not going to be happy.  But for a stripped down intro, this is far from the worst sin committed here.  These are some of Maynard’s less conceited lyrics for the most part.  Not to mention, I actually really love the patience of this one.  While I do sort of wish this one picked up a little, or was, you know, an actual Metal tune.  “Eat the Elephant” is alright, plus, there’s more emotion on anything here than on “eMOTIVe”.  Now, while “Disillusioned” isn’t exactly heavy in the classic sense, the added extra oomph is a nice touch here.  But the fact that this is all still revolving around a Piano is certainly going to rustle some jimmies.  I still think Maynard’s performance is commendable and the pacing is solid though.  At least, at first, because while this track has a fantastic base to it, this gets preachy unbelievably quick.  Not only that but this instrumental just falls apart.  I don’t even mind that this becomes a straight up Piano ballad and barely comes back.  In general this ,track is just all over the place.  Certain elements are ok, but we’ve waited so long for this?  OK, so one thing I do have to commend Maynard and the gang on is this atmosphere, because “Contrarian” is thick with about 3 c’s.  This one just creeps along and is seriously unnerving.  And while this still isn’t exactly what I expected to hear, this is certainly likable.  I love the pounding drums, and for a few minutes, the band really step away from the piano for the most part.  But when it does come in, it’s even a little refreshing.  As far as a genuine Gothic-tinged tune, this is one of the best tracks of the litter.  Plus, I love just how muscular the instrumentals get in the second half.  I mean, if they’re going to strip down their sound, this would be the way to do it.  But at this point in the album, I needed a little oomph, which I actually get with “The Doomed”.  This is one of the most legitimately heavy tunes on this entire album, and easily one of the best sounding ones.  Sure, Maynard is at his cheesiest and most ridiculous, but I feel like even the most conceited of his fans may find something to dig here.  “The Doomed” is triumphant, explosive and the closest thing you’re going to hear on this album close to an actual Metal tune.  There are some super artsy moments on this as well which are a little more hit and miss.  But after 14 years, if this is the heaviest we can hear them, this really isn’t bad.  But man, it would be a shame if this album just spiraled out of control completely.

    So let’s be real, so far this album hasn’t been terrible.  But for everything I’ve been able to say about this album being sort of aright so far, “So Long, And Thanks For All The Fish” makes me want to take it all back.  Why am I listening to an honest to God cheery and positive track from A Perfect Circle?  This isn’t what I signed up for, and I’m sure it’s not what anyone wants to hear these days.  All of that pacing is out the window, the winding performances are no more, and in its place, we’re getting fucking Arena Rock.  Not even a slight Arena feel, this is a true blue lighter ballad.  A Perfect Circle wanted this to be a gigantic, epic recording so badly But with just how genuinely cheesy this is, the lackluster Goth Rock we’ve been getting so far seems like the greatest material they’ve ever recorded.  I am lost for words.  Now, of all the tracks here I do have to hand it to “TalkTalk”.  This may be the closest thing to an actual A Perfect Circle tune.  Sure, it’s still a little bit watered down, and it’s still dead set on a Piano driven sound.  But this track at the very least has enough good moments here, from the pounding drums to Maynard’s genuinely twisted performance that makes this track come off very solid.  That Arena-Rock vibe is FAR behind us, and we’re back in the dismal catacombs of the early days of this band.  The solo here is great, the pacing is phenomenal, and even Maynard himself just sounds at home and back to his old self.  I mean, this is still a far cry from where we expected to hear this band after all of these years.  But tracks like “TalkTalk” are a whole lot better than they should be honestly.  But with “By and Down The River”, it’s becoming very apparent very quickly that this album is just not good.  Some of Maynard’s vocal inflections here are some of the cheesiest vocals I’ve heard all year.  Like, did Chris Daughtry of all people take over lead vocal duties here?  The rest of this track is average at best, but mostly because this entire album is average at best.  I continue to be brought down by Maynard’s vocals because they’ve just gotten so far from where I want to hear him.  They don’t even come off as emotional anymore, they’re just goofy.  And it’s a shame, because there are some solid elements here, like that guitar solo which may actually be one of the best of the album.  But everything else about this track is the tamest we’ve ever heard this band at.  Then we get “Delicious”, and what even is this?  The fact that Maynard and crew just sound so positive and sweet and toothless is appalling.  Like, what happened to that atmosphere?  Look at the album cover, then listen to this arena-sized freaking Folk Rock tune.  Yea, there are moments that sound like there’s a little something going on deep down.  But at what cost?  As “Delicious” goes on, it just get’s even more cheesy.  The Strings aren’t emotional at all, and this instrumental is just so flimsy.  This album has gone from average at best to genuinely hard to listen to.

    Now, at the absolute very least “DLB” actually does have some serious emotion behind it.  Also, this Piano piece may be one of the tensest of the entire album.  It’s an alright interlude, one that I actually don’t mind at all.  But shouldn’t they be focusing so much more on the big picture?  Or writing more than 2 or 3 good songs.  Now, “Hourglass” is certainly the most abrasive tune here.  As far as the beat goes and the instrumental, there’s some interesting stuff going on.  But I’m sorry, is this the new A Perfect Circle album or the new AWOLNATION album?  So much of this is still so damn cheesy, with this one focusing way too hard on gimmicks.  Most of them work out horribly, with Maynard sounding like everything from a poor mans Marilyn Manson to the aforementioned AWOLNATION.  But some of the effects on the chorus are genuinely strange, and some of the most exciting moments here.  Simply put, this track at the very least had potential.  Now, I do applaud this track for being a little bit more intense and heavier.  I wanted to like “Hourglass” but so much of this is still laughable and a seriously poor choice.  This track just ends up confusing me more than anything, especially with that 2 minute instrumental outdo that was absolutely not worth it.  Up next we have “Feathers”.  And hey, while I’m at it, maybe I should point out the album is incredibly one dimensional.  This track here literally sounds like 5 other tracks here.  Sure, once again there’s a strong atmosphere and some excellent pacing.  But with that, comes more of the same Piano balladry as well as Maynard’s strangest vocals yet.  I don’t even know what to make of this album anymore.  I can barely even say parts of these tracks are sort of alright anymore because everything is quickly blending together.  14 years, 14 freaking years and this is all A Perfect Circle can give us?  Then we have “Get The Lead Out”, and at this point, it seems that even A Perfect Circle have given up.  This track is sluggish, emotionless, and I couldn’t tell you that this was A Perfect Circle if I had to.  This one, as it rolls on becomes more and more cringe-worthy by the moment.  From a cluttered instrumental to some vocals that sound more like Maynard trying out for Alt-J than anything, this is a mess.  “Get the Lead Out” doesn’t wrap up anything, this just shows how dangerously unfocused Maynard is at this time in his career.  So, uhh, hows that new Tool album coming?

Rating: 6.2/10

Give A Listen To: "Contrarian", "The Doomed", "TalkTalk", "Eat The Elephant" (I guess....)

Genre: Alternative Metal / Gothic Rock / Genuinely Bad Arena Rock

Overall Thoughts:  While this album starts out confident and reassuring that these Alternative Metal icons are back with a vengeance, it becomes quickly very apparent that that's far from the case.  There was a time where A Perfect Circle was a genuinely solid alternative to a lot of the Metal and Alternative wallowing around.  But this is, simply put, not that.  Not all of the material here is bad.  Hell, when Maynard gets his head out of his gigantic ass for a few short minutes he comes through with some genuinely heavy, well thought out material.  But the bulk of this album is completely toothless, faceless, and sadly boring.  The fact that in 2018 Maynard James Keenan has been reduced to preachy piano ballads and honest to God Arena Rock is absolutely headache-inducing.